Thursday, January 03, 2008

*Puff*Puff*

Happy New Year!

I've been avoiding my beloved computer for the past few days. Not because it's acting up, good computer, sit. Stay. But because quitting smoking is a LOT harder for me when I'm on the computer or the telephone. These are were my biggest times to smoke. Like a chimney. Chaining the whole time. Very unconsciously I could go through a whole pack just in a phone call. Sheesh.

I've been plugging away at not smoking with mostly success. Many nights I have had one - or a half a cigarette. This is not perfection, but it is incredible progress and I'll take it. Unfortunately those times I've given in and had one were times I was on the phone - or the computer - or both at once. So I'm laying low on both to give myself time to let go of that connection.

What that all means is: haven't posted much here. Though I have composed some fabulous posts in my head before I get out of bed in the morning. Sadly they never actually make it past my own brain. Ah well. If they were really so compelling, I'm sure the urge to commit them to paper would have been stronger.

I did make one New Year's Resolution. I'm not fond of them because of the beatings we give ourselves when we ultimately don't keep them. It's a lot of pressure to give things up or change your life just because of the date. It's different if you've prepped beforehand, but most New Year's Resolutions are amorphous: I want to lose weight, want to exercise more, write a novel, climb Mt. Kilimanjaro, you know, the usual. But with no planning these goals just sort of get away from us; usually with the resounding refrain of "I'll do it tomorrow" and then suddenly the year has passed and we do it all again. So I don't usually make 'em. But this year I did. It's a simple one (hopefully!). I just want to be able to run a half mile straight without having to stop to walk.

I know that sounds like such a nothing, but I have this cranky knee that has really put the kibosh on my running. Which sucks hard, because, naturally, all I WANT to do is run. Typical. I have found that my current 'knee limit' is 5.4 mph for 2 minutes. If I go faster than that, or longer than that, I end up with a swollen knee that takes days or even weeks to go away and hurts like a moth.... well, you can guess what it hurts like. I can do those two minutes several times in the course of a running session with no problem - as long as I walk in between. Bah. So I'm working towards increasing that two minutes - just by 15 seconds every week until I can do a the whole 1/2 mile without having to stop AND without the damned swelling and pain.

After that I'm planning on writing my next novel and climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro. Just so you know.

8 comments:

Bella said...

I think you've made excellent progress on quitting smoking. Cutting down to almost nothing sounds pretty close to perfection to me.

I wanted to let you know that you've inspired me to quit, as well. I signed up for a Freedom from Tobacco program at Kaiser that begins on Jan. 8. The program meets once a week for an hour for 7 weeks. The doctors are there to prescribe medication, if needed, and I think it will be, in my case. I'm scared but looking forward to quitting so that I can be healthier.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

I am so proud of you on the smoking thing!

I hope you are able to make your resolution. Please keep in mind that if you can't it is because your body does not want to, and it doesn't want to for a reason.

Will you write the book while you are climbing the mountain?

Happy New Year!

BetteJo said...

I swear nothing makes you feel worse than trying to quit smoking because it can be so damn hard! Sounds like you've accomplished a lot!

Ladron de Basura (a.k.a. Junk Thief) said...

The computer makes me sometimes think I will end up smoking too. Hang in there! We're all cheering for you. Happy 2008.

CrankMama said...

That sounds like awesome progress to me. All forward motion counts!

A very happy (belated) New Year to you!

Gary said...

Lordy, I was thinking...it hurts like a moth? Does a moth hurt? And then I read on. OY! And I am a reading teacher. OOPS. Well, it gave me a laugh and these days that is a welcome thing. Love ya!

Joy Keaton said...

Bella - GOOD LUCK! Can't wait to hear how it goes for you!

Whim - I can't write while climbing, I'll too busy reading your first draft! :)

Bettejo - it SUX! Not really craving nicotine so much as missing the hand to mouth motion of smoking. *sigh* It'll pass... so they say. ;)

JT - DON'T you start smoking now! ;)

Mama - Thanks, I'm feeling pretty good about my baby steps. And Happy 2008 back atcha!

Gary - moths DO hurt. Very badly. Do not get locked in a room alone with one. They are VICIOUS!

Salty Miss Jill said...

Yay! One thing at a time, lady. You'll get there...just keep plugging ahead. you know we've all got your back.
And happy New Year!